Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Right or easy?
Why is doing the right thing, not always the easiest thing? Maybe because doing the right thing means I have to step outside of my own selfishness. It is easy for me to be selfish, but rarely is that the right thing. (Actually I can't think of any time that is the right thing, but there may be some circumstances where they are the same.) Maybe it is because we remember the things that are hard. When we have it come easy, we don't always learn. I often want the simplest path, but rarely does it work that way. So today I took a step to do the right thing. Easy? No. Actually it is uncomfortable, but it is still the right thing. Is there something you need to do that may not be easy, but is the right thing? Take that step now. Don't wait until it is convenient (it never will be), don't wait for a better time (there isn't one), don't wait until you have it all figured out (you probably won't), just do what right now you know is right. Hope you struggle with this today like I am.
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I had a dream last night that I told my family (mother and extended family... Some of who have passed on). How I felt about being ostrasized ( in the family) for doing the right thing once. The ostracizing is still ongoing today in some way. But the thing about this dream was that I found my voice.
I was able to tell people how their brokeness effects me personally and how in some ways it has set me down the long path of isolation that I still struggle with today.
Dealing with pain is always necessary and in some weird way today feels like a humongous break through for me. But in the end we're all responsible for what we to with that pain.
Today my choices of right verses convenient are about reaching out to (and secretly) forgiving someone who still
has no clue. I am going to make a call today. Not to open it all up again but to try and restore something from my end. Prayers would be apreciated.
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