Two thoughts for the price of one

I am finding myself spending more time trying to get my mind around some tough topics. One is the realization that people I know, some even pretty well, may be going to hell. Yeah, I have always know that, but I don't live it with much urgency. I have rationalized in the past that I can't push them or say certain things around them as it may offend them and I may lose an opportunity when they are ready to talk about it, but really that is the easy way out. They may talk about a relationship with Christ in a theoretical sense or even go consistently to church, but that doesn't mean they are going to heaven. I think a lot of times, I am more concerned with how they will view me instead of the fact that they may be gambling with their eternity. Don't know when you cross that line from being concerned with them to being pushy, but I think I truly have a lot of room before I get to the pushy stage. Looking at some of the friendships that I have challenged, they really haven't been hurt any when I have questioned what they believe or how they are living that out. They may not agree and are fine with where they are at currently, but it doesn't change the fact that I need to be doing my part as well. Can't shy away from the tough assignments even though I would rather pretend a lot of times that everyone I know is going to be included with the lambs. Reality tells me otherwise.

Second thought is I wonder if I will ever be able to clearly say what I believe. I know the core of what I believe, but I have been challenged a lot recently in what all that means. Things I used to take for granted, I now wrestle with and try to figure out how that plays out in my life. Things I haven't really thought about or taken the time to look at seem to be popping up with greater frequency. I don't think it is a bad thing, but a sign that I am growing. I just wonder if it all makes sense at some point. Do we get to the place where the doubts or questions we don't know how to answer finally become clear to us? I feel like the more people I know, the more I study, the more I question, the less I know. Maybe I am just realizing that there aren't any easy answers. The circumstances, the people, my past all influence what I believe and that is constantly changing. What I believed with conviction 5 years ago may not be the same as today. Some days my head just hurts from trying to make sense of it all.