Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Disappointment
How do you handle disappointment? How do you respond to someone who lets you down? We have expectations (realistic or not) of how things will go and how people will respond. So what happens when it doesn't go as expected? Regardless of what we like to think at times, we don't control the outcome or results. When others are involved there can be thousands of different ways things can turn out, many which we don't expect. But really it isn't about whether are expectations are met or not. It is about how we respond. We control that part. We can choose to be bitter and hold a grudge. We can choose to forgive. We can choose to walk away and not trust again. A lot things are out of our control, but our attitude is our choice. So what do you do when someone disappoints you? What do you do when you trust someone and get hurt in the process? We can blame others, point fingers or simply decide how we are going to respond. The choice is yours.
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Dissapointment is always a big deal for me. Because traditionally I'm a feeler of things a lot of times anything said or done to me (or near me) have a very personal feel. I used to try and begin dealing with it from a perspective that tried to identify the truth and whether what was said/done negatively was truly meant that way, or if it was deliberate/accidental... Etc.
I am learning to do it differently now because the other stuff has me trying to read peoples minds and guess about things. That can be maddening sometimes because you never do find the answer in yourself.
I will admit that I tend to hold grudges where I am
convinced I have been wronged.
I was at a leadership thing a few weeks ago however and was given the opportunity to drop those grudges and forgive and after months and months on this one particular issue I finally did it, and I can say that giving it up is freeing.
I'm shocked that always takes me so long to learn the same lessons again over and over. There's something about my life that's not always real rational.
I think sometimes obedience to God is the only place to begin on things like these (forgiveness) and what it often feels like is a leap of blind faith. That's not saying that dedication and commitment to Jesus is unreasonable or irrational. But sometimes when your sitting in it in the moment and you are presented with a chance to step out there and do it, rationality can seem a long way away. .....,(one of the reasons we don't do it often or with ease). Sometimes a blind leap in the moment is just that, a blind
leap.
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