Thursday, August 27, 2009
The art of grace
How do you provide room for grace while still holding someone accountability? Seems to be a tough line to walk at times in knowing when to challenge someone and when to extend grace as they grow. I honestly don't know what the most loving thing to do is in some situations. A challenge when someone needs forgiveness and understanding may hurt their growth. Letting something slide that needs to be challenged can also hurt them. That is one of the reasons that we need to be invested deeply in each others lives. If I am spending time with someone, then I usually know which is more needed at the time. If I only see someone briefly every couple of weeks or only in passing, then it becomes a lot more difficult in loving that person in the best way for them. Extending grace and knowing when to challenge someone isn't an exact science. There are no hard and fast rules, no matter what some may say. Love is the command. Sometimes that looks more like grace, other times it looks more like accountability. Do you need grace or accountability right now? Do you need to extend grace or challenge someone in their faith right now? No matter where you are at, love is always the right response. Have an incredible day loving others!
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Ironicaly I am on my way right now for a meeting ( at work) to hold someone accountable. I have stressing about it all night.
It's true, there is no exact science. Sometimes people aren't ready for the challenge, and accountability sends the running or shuts them down. And sometimes timely accountability can save someones soul.
The God way is very broad, sending rain and continuing to give awesome life gifts to the evil and the just alike.... Ie sometimes he allows us to be as we are. And as hellish as the world that we tend to make for ourselves is, he rolls with it. I'm humbled by the reality that no matter where I am on my Christian walk and success I've had overcoming some of my crap, underneath there is more, stuff that were he to hit me with the realization of all of it, it would make me hopeless. Instead, he watches and waits and brings me along.
On the other hand, he loves. And the way that he loves us is to rescue me from my Hell and that means I have to start waking up to some hard realities. That is the beauty of community. Grace happens in terms of waiting and watching and it's the place where real love can reach a hard heart in ways that other things/people can't. Community seems to be the chosen tool for the change/salvation of the world.
When to pull the trigger on accountability? I think like every thing else we listen to God and act in faith. You're right. No absolutes there. As you said It's an art.
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